sábado, 19 de setembro de 2009

Saber não ocupa lugar - agora riam-se

PORQUE O SABER NÃO OCUPA LUGAR

Alevantar - O acto de levantar com convicção, com o ar de 'a mim ninguém me come por parvo!... alevantei-me e fui-me embora!'.
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Assentar - O acto de sentar, só que com muita força, como fosse um tijolo a cair no cimento. Capom - Porta de motor de carros que quando se fecha faz POM!
Destrocar - Trocar várias vezes a mesma nota até ficarmos com a mesma.
Disvorciada - Mulher que se diz por aí que se vai divorciar.
É assim... - Talvez a maior evolução da língua portuguesa. Termo que não quer dizer nada e não serve para nada. Deve ser colocado no início de qualquer frase. Muito utilizado por jornalistas e intelectuais.
Entropeçar - Tropeçar duas vezes seguidas.
Êros - Moeda alternativa ao Euro, adoptada por alguns portugueses.
Falastes, dissestes... - Articulação na 4ª pessoa do singular. Ex.: eu falei, tu falaste, ele falou, TU FALASTES..
Fracturação - O resultado da soma do consumo de clientes em qualquer casa comercial. Casa que não fractura... não predura.
Há-des - Verbo 'haver' na 2ª pessoa do singular: 'Eu hei-de cá vir um dia; tu há-des cá vir um dia...'
Inclusiver - Forma de expressar que percebemos de um assunto. E digo mais: eu inclusiver acho esta palavra muita gira. Também existe a variante "Inclusivel".
Mô - A forma mais prática de articular a palavra MEU e dar um ar afro à língua portuguesa, como 'bué' ou 'maning'. Ex.: Atão mô, tudo bem?
Nha - Assim como Mô, é a forma mais prática de articular a palavra MINHA. Para quê perder tempo, não é? Fica sempre bem dizer 'Nha Mãe' e é uma poupança extraordinária.
Númaro - Também com a vertente "númbaro". Já está na Assembleia da República uma proposta de lei para se deixar de utilizar a palavra NÚMERO, a qual está em claro desuso. Por mim, acho um bom númaro!
Parteleira - Local ideal para guardar os livros de Protuguês do tempo da escola.
Perssunal - O contrário de amador. Muito utilizado por jogadores de futebol. Ex.: 'Sou perssunal de futebol'. Dica: deve ser articulada de forma rápida.
Pitaxio - Aperitivo da classe do 'mindoím'.
Prontus - Usar o mais possível. É só dar vontade e podemos sempre soltar um 'prontus'! Fica sempre bem.
Prutugal - País ao lado da Espanha. Não é a Francia.
Quaise - Também é uma palavra muito apreciada pelos nossos pseudo-intelectuais... Ainda não percebi muito bem o quer dizer, mas o problema deve ser meu.
Stander - Local de venda. A forma mais famosa é, sem dúvida, o 'stander' de automóveis. O "stander" é um dos grandes clássicos do "português da cromagem"...
Tipo - Juntamente com o 'É assim', faz parte das grandes evoluções da língua portuguesa. Também sem querer dizer nada, e não servindo para nada, pode ser usado quando se quiser, porque nunca está errado, nem certo. É assim... tipo, tás a ver?
Treuze - Palavras para quê? Todos nós conhecemos o númaro treuze.

E pronto...sabem de mais patacoadas no português?!
Juntem-nas à lista!*
Nós agradecemos!

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